Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

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Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

Post by Nekis13 on Tue Dec 02, 2014 10:59 pm

"Turn back while you still can." - Me while typing all this.

Backstory(Resumed-ish): Nekis was the youngest of his siblings, at the age of 2 his parents were “assassinated”, which changed him forever, he immediately evolved into an Umbreon from the shock and gained amnesia.

He didn’t remember his family even existed, and started his own life, away from his family, the only company he had was the pokemon he could wander into, when he was 13, his life changed again, this time, he met his siblings once more, which wasn’t just a pack of Eeveelutions, rather a HUGE one.

Bite me for the cliche.

Personality: As an Eevee, Nekis was a calm and quiet child, he saw the world differently than the rest of the people around him.

After his parent’s deaths, Nekis’ personality changed by the effects of amnesia and of course no parent-like figures, He seems to be a happy,very active and ongoing Umbreon, even sometimes foolish, he treats people equally, with a few exceptions.

He’s sometimes referred as “Evil” or just a plain douche by the way he tends to act sometimes, usually during tense moments. Even though he tries to stick to the “Good and righteous” Path. He would usually fuck up and do things his own way.

Likes: Cozy Places, company, Bricks, family, fighting.
Dislikes: Killing(Or witnessing the act.), being crowded, kidnappers, mazes, babysitting and Trainers.

Height: Average Eeveelution

Love main interest: Jolty

Relationships:

Darkness: He met Dark first out of the rest of his siblings, and has a very good bond with him.

Moe/C Moe: Occasionally, he thinks of both Moe’s as the same person, and would get confused. He cares a lot for his niece C Moe, on the other hand, he also respects his oldest brother.

Ahri (F.Assasin): Claims to be his parents' assasin. However, instead of hating Ahri, he tries his best to get the good side out of her.

Daisy: Even not being related to Daisy at all, they seem to have a Father/Daughter relationship.

Carry/Faux: He cares a lot about Carry, but, It’s a different story with Faux, so complicated he just wants to hug the shit out of her and cut her in half afterwards.

Nui(Sylveon): Nekis feels unsure of Nui, due to her attitude and her way of thinking. However, he feels comfortable around her knowing that he’s the only person she won’t kill or at least try to kill. she also gives him the nickname “Nekky”

Giving him a total score of 7.8/10 because of too much failed edgy.

I'll be adding more.


Last edited by Nekis13 on Wed Dec 03, 2014 10:22 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

Post by Devon (Aegislash) on Wed Dec 03, 2014 1:44 am

I give him 7.8/10 because of too much water
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Re: Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

Post by MoniStar on Wed Dec 03, 2014 2:06 am

I think he's interesting, well done Nekis ^^~~

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Re: Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

Post by Nekis13 on Wed Dec 03, 2014 4:09 pm

Devon (Aegislash) wrote:I give him 7.8/10 because of too much water

Too much Edgy-ness in the form of water.
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Re: Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

Post by Darkness (Umbreon) on Wed Dec 03, 2014 4:25 pm

Hm, not bad. It's in and out of a brief as I pick up. But I like it.

Story: Seems a bit cliche with the amnesia thing. But hey, most people do it anyway, and why not? 6/10

Trivia: Nothing really implies the trivia of your OC. But anywho. 4/10

Format: All I saw was strikeout. Not really a good contribution to an OC, seems a bit like a joke then. 4/10

What I think overall: The OC is alright. Has more flaws than I thought of, despite the fact I RP with you, (With no regret), I still can read through it without having too much of a laugh. 5.5/10.

"This OC seems very delicate on the outside, but on the inside, it looks like hell."

- Morgan.

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Re: Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

Post by Galom on Wed Dec 03, 2014 4:41 pm

Nekis13 wrote:[strike]Backstory(Resumed-ish): Nekis was the youngest of his siblings, at the age of 2 his parents were “assassinated”, which changed him forever, he immediately evolved into an Umbreon from the shock and gained amnesia.

He didn’t remember his family even existed, and started his own life, away from his family, the only company he had was the pokemon he could wander into, when he was 13, his life changed again, this time, he met his siblings once more, which wasn’t just a pack of Eeveelutions, rather a HUGE one.
Okay. First off, your OC seems fine. While there are some aspects of it that I object to, it seems good for the most part. What you said here in the first paragraph is, I hate to say it, an incredibly typical backstory. It baffles me why so many people choose to say their character's parents died when they were very young, since I wouldn't feel very original doing it. However, the fact that you actually have your OC be somewhat sour and grumpy, and not a badass, because of it is something I can respect. Not many people are willing to actually let their OC be somewhere in the "gray" area; they always want to be a total protagonist or a total antagonist. I enjoy the fact that your OC could be either, depending on who you ask.

You're doing fine, keep it up. Not gonna tell you to change the backstory to something more creative since you've already established your character pretty firmly.

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Re: Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

Post by Nekis13 on Wed Dec 03, 2014 4:53 pm

I see where you're going, As I said. I rushed through this, of course I have a little more to add. and you're right about not letting this OC being the "Absolute Hero" or "OMFG, I'M EVIL AND YOU MUST SUBMIT BECAUSE I'M BADASS." No, It actually made things easier to be Neutral.
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Re: Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

Post by Darkness (Umbreon) on Wed Dec 03, 2014 4:54 pm

Not bad for a rush, though.

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Re: Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

Post by Darkness (Umbreon) on Thu Dec 04, 2014 3:35 pm

Much better. Rating is up to 7/10.

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Re: Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

Post by Morfent on Thu Dec 04, 2014 10:55 pm

Why did the parents get assassinated? Where was the OC at the time? Does the assassin want to kill the OC as well?
Try adding aspects to his personality related to the backstory. He could act oddly or feral, and would probably be independent since he had no parents.


Last edited by Morfent on Thu Dec 04, 2014 10:59 pm; edited 1 time in total

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Re: Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

Post by MoniStar on Thu Dec 04, 2014 10:58 pm

Hey, just a thought, but what about actual events that describe why he dislikes what he dislikes.

I mean, most people dislike killing, and most people dislike kidnappers, But why does he dislike Mazes, babysitting and stuff. Some people just don't like trainers and being crowded, and I guess the same goes for babysitting, but Mazes isn't something you see to often, so I was just curious to see if there was any reasons behind it.

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Re: Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

Post by Nekis13 on Thu Dec 04, 2014 11:05 pm

Morfent wrote:Why did the parents get assassinated? Where was the OC at the time? Does the assassin want to kill the OC as well?
Try adding aspects to his personality related to the backstory. He could act oddly or feral, and would probably be independent since he had no parents.

I still haven't got the time to edit the Bio (Again), I have a thight schedule, Soo... adding bits to bits is the best I can do.

Thanks for the feedback tho~
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Re: Nekis' Super-Not-So-Sexy OC~ (UPDATED)

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