A Tiny-But-Really-Kinda-Large Talonflame, Crimson!

View previous topic View next topic Go down

A Tiny-But-Really-Kinda-Large Talonflame, Crimson!

Post by Day of the Dead on Sat Dec 06, 2014 7:43 pm

Crimson the Talonflame, one of my newer OCs that I've created. (Heck, as I write this message, I'm RPing as Crimson.)

Name: Crimson
Species: Talonflame (Shiny)
Gender: Female
Occupation: Professional flight performer
Wingspan: About 6 1/2 feet
Height: About 1.7 m
Likes: Flying, having fun, Damsel Berries (a type of berry, green color, sour flavor), sour flavors
Dislikes: Being grounded, seriousness, her brother, Team Code, bitter flavors

Here's her backstory:

As a Fletchling, she was quite happy, living in her tiny village with her family. (Kinda, you'll read why "kinda" later.) They had daily flight training sessions with older bird Pokemon, hunting sessions where they would be able to catch their own prey, and such. Usually, in their bird village, when the young evolved at least once, they could set off on their own to be free in their own ways. The young, ambitious Fletchinder she was, Crimson went to be a top performer for bird Pokemon all round to see! She wanted to chase her dreams higher and higher until she was up in the clouds. However, what did it take? A little bit of consequence, yes.

Her brother, Scarlet, almost downright hated Crimson. He had always picked on her from time to time. Yes, he was that one kid who'd get all the likes from other people and got flirted with, which made Crimson feel left out from the rest. Crimson would always hang by lonely, dead trees during play hours or lunch. It was the same thing every single day. Go to training, get picked on for being a knowledgeable flier with dreams, being lonely at play hours, it was just remotely the same thing.

When both Scarlet and Crimson were able to go off on their own to have their own lives, a group of strange Pokemon, calling themselves "Team Code" invaded parts of the territory. The "Team" seemed to consist of a Delphox, Alakazam, and a Gengar. However, they didn't seem to be bothering the bird village, so Scarlet and Crimson weren't alarmed. While Crimson was out pursuing her dream, Scarlet was visited by Team Code, and was asked to join them. Scarlet somewhat admired Team Code, because they looked so powerful. How could he decline?!

Now a fully-evolved Talonflame, Crimson was loved by millions. She attended parties, ceremonies, and other special events. She was most known for her finishing move, Flare Brave Dive, a mixture of the moves Flare Blitz, Brave Bird, and Sky Drop. Now that she had her dreams in her wings, it was Scarlet's turn to take his move. The un-shiny Talonflame tormented her once again, just like her childhood. He had apparently been possessed with psychic powers upon joining Team Code, giving him the power to access the dreams of others and turn them into nightmares.

After the thirtieth day of being tormented, Crimson couldn't tolerate it anymore. During being tormented of Scarlet, she had made friends with this group of Pokemon they call the "Midnight Nat Team". She requested for them to hunt down Scarlet and get him to stop tormenting Crimson. The leader, a Raichu, thought about this offer. They didn't want to hurt anybody, because they were more of a rescue team, but they accepted, as they thought it was for the better. They've successfully gotten rid of Scarlet for good.

Today, Crimson has retired from her showcasing, but usually she can be seen flying around fields for practice.

Reputation with the Midnight Nat Team:
Crimson is NOT part of the Midnight Nat Team. However, she is an ally with them.

------------

Soo, uh..Leave any feedback you want to! Uh...I'd say this was actually pretty good...Hehe..


Last edited by Day of the Dead on Sun Dec 06, 2015 12:57 pm; edited 4 times in total (Reason for editing : dat birthday doe)
avatar
Day of the Dead

Status :
Online
Offline

Posts : 441
Join date : 2014-11-28

View user profile https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHDWU5FOc04

Back to top Go down

Re: A Tiny-But-Really-Kinda-Large Talonflame, Crimson!

Post by *game-ender-espeon on Sat Dec 06, 2014 8:49 pm

Nice oc!

*game-ender-espeon

Status :
Online
Offline

Posts : 13
Join date : 2014-12-06

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: A Tiny-But-Really-Kinda-Large Talonflame, Crimson!

Post by The Penguinari of Sweg on Sat Dec 06, 2014 9:32 pm

I really like your backstory, Nat.  It's not generic, like the 'dead parents' backstory.  Even though one of my own OC's backstory includes dead parents.
Also, it reminds me a lot of Soren from Guardians of Ga'Hoole.  (Mean brother joins evil organization.)  And I like Guardians, so that's a plus.  :^)
The only piece of criticism I have is that she doesn't seem to have any 'downsides' or weaknesses as a character.  
Still a good and interesting OC, 8.5/10.
avatar
The Penguinari of Sweg

Status :
Online
Offline

Posts : 50
Join date : 2014-12-01

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: A Tiny-But-Really-Kinda-Large Talonflame, Crimson!

Post by Day of the Dead on Sat Dec 06, 2014 9:38 pm

The Penguinari of Sweg wrote:The only piece of criticism I have is that she doesn't seem to have any 'downsides' or weaknesses as a character.  
Still a good and interesting OC, 8.5/10.

Ah, I see. I haven't thought of that, to be honest.

rocks tho


Last edited by Midnight Nat :3 on Sun Dec 07, 2014 11:02 pm; edited 1 time in total
avatar
Day of the Dead

Status :
Online
Offline

Posts : 441
Join date : 2014-11-28

View user profile https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHDWU5FOc04

Back to top Go down

Re: A Tiny-But-Really-Kinda-Large Talonflame, Crimson!

Post by Dragonite99 on Sat Dec 06, 2014 9:56 pm

i like your OC! Her story is so full of detail! 10/10
avatar
Dragonite99

Status :
Online
Offline

Posts : 3535
Join date : 2014-11-29

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: A Tiny-But-Really-Kinda-Large Talonflame, Crimson!

Post by Day of the Dead on Sun Dec 07, 2014 11:04 pm

Hehehe...Thanks for the feedback on this OC..It really only took me a couple hours to figure this out..Maybe five or six? idk.

Also, I'd like to note that I somewhat based Scarlet's ability to enter dreams on Dream Eating Monochrome (specifically the dub by philsterman01).
avatar
Day of the Dead

Status :
Online
Offline

Posts : 441
Join date : 2014-11-28

View user profile https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHDWU5FOc04

Back to top Go down

Re: A Tiny-But-Really-Kinda-Large Talonflame, Crimson!

Post by LinkTheLeafeon on Sun Dec 21, 2014 1:12 am

I rate 10/10. But Scarlet Reminds Me of Gary Oak for some reason XD Loved the OC however
avatar
LinkTheLeafeon

Status :
Online
Offline

Posts : 16
Join date : 2014-11-29

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: A Tiny-But-Really-Kinda-Large Talonflame, Crimson!

Post by Lefty The Mawile on Fri Jan 23, 2015 2:07 am

I love it! The backstory is pretty detailed and I like how you added wingspan, gives us a better picture of your OC, all in all this bio is one of the most detailed bios out there, 9.5/10
avatar
Lefty The Mawile

Status :
Online
Offline

Posts : 53
Join date : 2014-11-30

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: A Tiny-But-Really-Kinda-Large Talonflame, Crimson!

Post by Day of the Dead on Sun Dec 06, 2015 12:57 pm

aaaaaHHHHHH

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BAE TALONFLAME CRIMSON!!!!
avatar
Day of the Dead

Status :
Online
Offline

Posts : 441
Join date : 2014-11-28

View user profile https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHDWU5FOc04

Back to top Go down

Re: A Tiny-But-Really-Kinda-Large Talonflame, Crimson!

Post by Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

View previous topic View next topic Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum